Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Naked 23 Year Old Goes On Stabbing Spree In Washington Heights

(NY Post) A naked, knife-wielding madman went on a bloody rampage in his Washington Heights apartment building yesterday, fatally stabbing one elderly resident and knifing three others before wounding himself, authorities said. The savage attacks began at about 4:10 p.m. when Christian Falero, 23, allegedly started knocking on doors and stabbed anyone who answered. A neighbor, Maurice Samuels, 31, said Falero was screaming incoherently. "This guy was yelling, 'If not 666, it's 777! Kill me, please! Do me a favor, kill me, please!' " Samuels said. Cops grabbed the deranged, bloody suspect within minutes. He was in stable condition last night. Charges were pending.

Talk about upping the ante for ding-dong-ditch huh? Back in the day we used to ring our neighbors doorbells and before the buzzer stopped I would be halfway down the street moving as fast as my size 12 Reebok Questions would take me. Completely terrified of getting caught.

But not Christian Falero. That guy just throws on the old birthday suite, starts knocking away and next thing you know he's in full on Michael Meyers mode. Straight slashing and gashing like the killer in Scary Movie.

You have to feel bad for the victim here. Could you imagine making it to your 80's and then going out like this? Your childhood years were spent in the cross hairs of the great depression and WWII for god's sake. Dude was probably tougher than nails, just your typical gritty, hard working New Yorker. He hears a knock at the door and probably thought it was his latest Viagra shipment but nope, just it's your naked, knife wielding, psychopathic neighbor coming to kill you. Just like Lloyd Christmas said*, "Life is a fragile thing, Har. One minute you're chewin' on a burger, the next minute you're dead meat."


* Okay so that quote doesn't 100% match what happened with this story, but you get the point

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