Saturday, December 29, 2012

Week 17 NFL Picks



My fantasy football season and hopes of championship glory went up in flames last weekend after losing two big money championships in the late hours of Sunday afternoon, due to a Matt Forte ankle injury, and a last minute roster switch (flex'd BJGE instead of Sproles). It had been an incredible run (reached the finals in 4/5 leagues) and it was finally starting to look like all the hours of compulsive research, writing and watching would pay off. And although it technically did "pay off" (I made 2.5x my initial investment), those two specific title game loses made it hard for my to sleep at night. I had both trophies within reach and I let them slip away worse than Sty Stallone is the opening scene of Cliffhanger. Fantasy football can be cruel.

So with my fantasy season ending and the Giants doing their best Jets impersonation, football just doesn't have the same meaning to me heading into week 17. I know my situation is nothing like that of John Mayer and Taylor Swift, but I can't help but feel like only half of my heart feels invested in the rest of the NFL season. It's weird because obviously I'm still going to watching the games, but that vested interest I held so dear all season long has gone away. No more checking my iPhone for updates 200x on Sunday, no more snarky texts to league-mates, no more sweating out the Sunday and Monday night games. Nope, from here on out it's strictly entertainment for me.

The way football was intended to be.

2 Man Weave Anti-Lock Of The Week (10-6) Seattle -10.5 vs the Rams 


The Seahawks are on god damn fire right now. They're averaging more than 50 points in their last three games and are look as close to unbeatable as we've seen a team play all season. They've beaten the Packers, Niners, Bears and Patriots and are undefeated at home this season. I know I made a case for Alfred Morris to be ROY last week, but now it's not even a question. If Russell Wilson doesn't win it's going to be a travesty. Don't be surprised if St. Louis gets shut out this weekend. 

And now, the picks!


The King's Throne  
Muggsey  117-114-5  Buff- 3.5, N.E. -10, Bal +2.5, Indy +6.5, Tenn -4, NYG -7.5, Wash -3, Det +3, G.B. -3, N.O. -5,  Den -16, Ari +16.5, Sea -10.5  

Watch The Throne
Gary 116-115-5    fell off the face of the Earth 

Chooch  115-116-5  NYJ +3.5, N.E. -10, Bal +2.5, Hou -6.5, Tenn -4, NYG _7.5, Wash -3, Chi -3, Minn +3, N.O. -5,  Den -16, S.F. -16.5, Sea -10.5

Flem 113-118-5  NYJ +3.5, N.E. -10, Bal +2.5, Indy +6.5, Tenn -4, Philly +7.5, Wash -3, Chi -3, G.B. -3, N.O. -5,  Den -16, S.F. -16.5, St. Lou +10.5


The Mush
Danye 105-126-5  Buff -3.5, Mia +10, Cin -2.5, Hou -6.5, Tenn -4, NYG -7.5, Dal +3, Det +3, G.B. -3, Car +5,  Den -16, Ari +16.5, Sea -10.5

Obscure Gif Of The Week / Bike Meet Car




Babe of the Week / Leighton Meester





Random YouTube Video Of The Week That Has Nothing To Do With Football / Lady Picks Ass And Eats It



Gametime Snack Of The Week / Firecrackers!



Chief Keef "Locked 'N Loaded" Fantasy Player To Watch For


"First off I just wanna say shit's been real fun givin y'all advice dis fall. If you listened, you prolly got yo bread right, and if you didn't, you a ho. Anyways I fucked up last week and got caught with the burner on the corner of Lennox and 82nd. Dis young cat sold my boy Tito some bunk E and you know we's wasn't gonna eat that loss. Had to get some payback so Tito roughed him up with the back end of the pistol and we dipped. Thought aything was gravy til 5-0 rolled up on us and searched the whip. Got caught violating my probation with the niner so your boy may be going away for a lil bit. That's that shit I don't like."

-3hunna (@danye33)

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